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On a Time Budget

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Currently I am running my small business on a tight budget. Therefore, I am quite precise with how I allocate my 9-4 office hours. They’re all I’ve got to work with at the moment! The business is raising healthy children. The budget I’m referring to is my use of time. Next year that same time will stretch differently. With baby in creche the 9-4 is more flexible as his needs will be taken care of, so I have more freedom of movement and scheduling. For instance, this morning I got a call that my kinder daughter's skirt is too big, and it is really bothering her. She had no spares. So, they asked if I’m out and about anyways can I come drop one off? But I had a plan. I wasn’t going out until 2 and didn’t change that plan. Weighing up various values and priorities, that’s what we do. There is a real relief and sense of identity in being able to say, “no, not now.” In just knowing your own parameters. I guess baby's creche doesn't really need to feature in that equation, if...
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The Bots

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 I started this blog when I was a mother of 2 and just needed a space of my own to vent and express. Went through phases of using it, never quite putting my full name to my pieces. At one point 10 years in (mid Covid when all pretences to facades went out the windows!) I linked a video of myself, basically finally sharing my identity.  Even so, I still don't use the blog as a primary way of sharing. It's scary to be authentic. The perfectionist in me wants to go back through every old post and censor them all. Always worried about what others will think of me... And yet I'm writing that as a blog piece! Have all my filters dropped? 🤪  One fascinating thing that happened in the void was *THE BOTS* Oh the comments they left! The first time I noticed them in the form of 15 comments on one post I  actually thought I'd achieved fame.  Ha! There were 83 fake comments :(  And some of them were flattering too... I've cleaned them up now and will keep a closer eye ...
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When does today end? The Corona Mothering Life

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Night and day bleed into each other. With everyone around all day, there is no beginning and no end. I've desperately tried to carve out some none-work time. Turned off WiFi for a while so that we could all connect. And it was nice. But then the minutes and hours continue ticking along and though the younger ones are asleep the older two keep coming down for snacks and conversation. I'd decided that instead of feeling stressed about how much work I had to complete with everyone home all day, it was time to work. Younger children were in bed and I had tidied up most of the kitchen and eating area. Could have been perfect. But the older two lag, waiting for the final closure perhaps. The rigidity of a bedtime enforced by Mother. Well they were in the kitchen and my hand was hurting from all the tapping and typing. Walked over to hang out, chat somewhat. But they seemed to cranky. Once they had my attention, or in order to get it (can't remember the sequence!) they squabbl...
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City Streets - Review and Teaching Resource

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I've always found this song inspirational. "City Streets" by Chanale picks up on a story in the Talmud where Rabbi Akiva takes a positive spin on a challenging circumstance. The nation is in mourning. Everyone is stuck at home due to a terrible virus. Just kidding: the Romans persecuted the people, destroying our central place of worship. Once, Akiva and his friends visited the site of the former sanctuary. His friends cried, he laughed. You can see the details in the song or download my PowerPoint on the Gemara which I created for my Jewish History students. In truth, this lesson isn't just history. It's a powerfully transformative tool all growth mindset and positivity.  (Can you explain to me why the editor doesn't like my spelling choices! Anyways, here's the song:) I love how Chanale completely picks up on the hope and optimism of Rabbi Akiva. When he saw destruction, he didn't SEE destruction. He saw a promise fulfilled, a stepping ston...
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"TODAY" - a poem

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You are hired To be inspired Drop the blues Pull on your shoes This is your life: choose Jump in and live it See Divinity within it  Ta'amu u'riu Future's mostly up to you Attitude you can craft Choose joy. Choose to laugh. What has been, was What will be, will come This moment is it Dive in Explore Hayom la'asosa Make it proud Make it yours THIS MOMENT Gifted from above Choose to live it with purpose Dance through it with love
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Decided to Be Decisive

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You can't cram in life. It only creates strife.  Be the choice wrong or right Just drop the fight And do it right You have a purpose, a mission.  Go and live it.  Stop retracing your steps,  Time to jump in it.  I am constantly re-deciding to be a teacher. It would be so settling to be decisive. To know that I am not adjusting my work commitments and just proceed ahead. But that's not who I am. I am a thinker. I've tossed around the same question of "should I work" so long that it morphed into, "how much should I work" until it reached a point where my best friend identified my work cycle. Stage One: Made a commitment Stage Two: Overwhelmed with the commitment Stage Three: Cut back my responsibilities Stage Four: Bored so make more commitments Then back to stage two and round again. She figured that out a while ago. A year or two even. So for the first year I followed the cycle as usual with her laughing sadly. At the start...
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In but not of - becoming a "Guide on the Side"

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On the one hand, there is an incredible advantage to taking things personally. In Chassidic terminology, that is called being a "Pnimi". A Pnimi is someone who integrates their learning, has in inward-focus and applies everything. They know that it's real and applicable and take the journey seriously. And yet... it is exhausting to live life Pnimiusdikally. I consider a particular student who has questions about  everything.   She struggles, man. I feel for her. Constantly battling integration or seeking authenticity. It is a heavy-duty approach to life. Thing is.. she's real. I feel her struggle because I do it, too. That's me. In the classroom, letting the girls behaviour get under my skin or their questions rankle me deep inside. NO! Part of moving to being a  Guide on the Side is placing the students front and centre. I've been working on this for two years! Of course, I need to put myself in the class, be present and be a part of it. But it needs...
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