Mommy Morah

A bit of self reflection before Rosh Hashana... Found this short draft from April: I'm disappointed with myself. I cut back on work for the express purpose of being more available for my family. It's been two months and I still haven't gotten my act together. Take tonight for instance: When the kids came home from school today I served dinner and hung out with them. But then I started to feel a bit restless, and as bedtime drew near, I started marking tests when I should have been dressing the little 'uns in p-jams. And now: The next term I increased my teaching load from one subject to four subjects, in addition to sporadic subbing. Last week I taught 17 hours face to face! When I try to picture the amount of preparation that went into that... shudder. My  kaf hakelah  experience this year taught me two really important things: 1. Firstly, like the old VP at school used to say, "If you want to make sure something will happen then give the job to the busies...

"...al mitzvas Tzitzis," Mimi intoned as she lifted the hems of her skirt to her lips with a kiss, "Now the girl's bracha!" "What's the girl's bracha?" "Hareini mekabel..." Hmm, she might be right after all. I've spent so much of my mental energies lately analyzing my role as  wife, mom of three, housekeeper and such. Maybe it all comes down to this one bracha: accepting the responsibility of loving my family like myself, even when that entails washing their clothes, wiping spills and picking up after them.  Thanks, Mim.

My brother took me for a ride. He was quite the handful, actually. When we started out, he was ever so cautious. It was his fist time behind the SUV wheel and he understood his limitations. It took about 12 minutes to reach our destination, normally 5 minutes away. For instance, he let three rounds of a traffic light pass before making it across a busy intersection without a light. But given the circumstances, that was great. Timing does not feature as an important goal for a new driver. His focus and caution earned him many a point. We arrived at our destination. My sister and her new husband were excited to see the fresh-faced driver at the wheel, and his enthusiasm for the trip went up a few notches. A few too many notches, that is... "Calm down, brother." I cautioned him, "easy does it." But it was too late. He was high. We hit the road again, but this time the results were downright scary. His sharp turns and speed had us nervously barking orders. T...

A few months ago I stepped onto an airplane with three children and stayed there for fourteen hours. There were many other people on the flight, but those three little chocolate balls were my responsibility for the trip. People were amazed that I was brave enough to travel solo. But there was one person who's comment really astounded. CL is a friend who I admire to no end. She comes from a similar background to mine, but she made a lifestyle choice that I envy. CL is a SAHM. My hero-style mom. And yet... and yet... when I threw the compliment back at her, "What do you mean? You are a full time mother all the time" she quickly returned with, "Sure, but never for fourteen hours straight on my own." So I've spent some time thinking and wondering about what made the trip work. Today I came up with a new thought. Plane ride = purpose. As in, my to-do list for the flight had one item on it: take care of the children. You see, sometimes I can have a day that ...